You’re Doing Your Best: Navigating The Emotional Rollercoaster of Your Animal’s Illness

By Sarah Griffiths, DCH

As an animal guardian, witnessing your beloved companion face health challenges can be an emotionally turbulent experience. In my practice, I see a wide array of feelings come to the surface as an illness develops in a pet or a horse. Guilt, confusion and fear are common as you try to make decisions on your friend’s behalf. Healing is not a linear process; there will be ups and downs, and it’s okay to feel overwhelmed. Having compassion for yourself and seeking professional guidance can significantly ease the journey.

Understanding the Non-Linear Nature of Healing

Healing, whether physical or emotional, rarely follows a straight path. There may be periods of improvement followed by setbacks. This unpredictability can be disheartening but it’s a natural part of the process. I often see frustration when speaking with clients, especially in difficult cases where an auto-immune illness flares up. Acknowledging the progress you are making can help you maintain patience and resilience during the tough times.

The Phenomenon of Guilt When Exploring Alternative Care

Venturing beyond conventional animal care into alternative therapies can bring a sense of empowerment. However, it can also lead to feelings of guilt, especially upon discovering practices you wish you’d known earlier. You might worry that past decisions inadvertently caused your animal discomfort or harm. Remember, guilt is a natural response, but it’s crucial not to let it overshadow your capacity to focus on caregiving. As Maya Angelou wisely said, “When we know better, we do better.” Use your newfound knowledge to make informed choices moving forward and not to berede yourself for past decisions.

The Importance of Professional Guidance

In the age of the internet, information is abundant and often conflicting. You can find an argument on any side of the fence if you go searching. Attempting to navigate an illness solely through online resources can lead to increased confusion and anxiety. Engaging an experienced holistic animal health professional offers several benefits:

1. Personalized Assessment: Professionals can provide tailored evaluations of your animal’s condition, considering unique factors that generic online advice may overlook.

2. Educational Support: A trusted expert serves as a reliable source to answer questions, clarify doubts, and guide you through unfamiliar treatments or practices.

3. Stress Reduction and Support: Knowing you have a knowledgeable partner can alleviate the pressure of making decisions alone, allowing you to focus more on your animal’s care.

   
   

Other Emotions that Can Surface During Times of Illness

It’s also normal to other emotions when your friend is sick including:

• Confusion: Feeling lost amidst a sea of information and advice.

• Fear: Concerns about their future and the effectiveness of treatments.

• Desperation: Trying multiple solutions without clear guidance, leading to frustration and anxiety.

• The Need to Control the Process: Trying to control the outcomes of a disease process is futile. Do yourself a favour and process events as they arise without judging what the healing process should look like.

  
  

Strategies to Support Yourself in Difficult Times

To navigate life challenges, remember to practice the following:

1. Practice Self-Compassion: Avoid self-blame for past actions taken without complete information. Maintaining a positive mindset benefits both you and your animal.

2. Hire a Professional: Research and select a holistic animal health practitioner who resonates with you. Feeling comfortable to ask questions and learn is vital for a collaborative relationship.

3. Stay Present: Focus on current, observable behaviors and symptoms. Dwelling on past mistakes or uncontrollable factors can hinder your ability to notice subtle changes in your animal’s condition.

4. Trust Your Intuition: As the main caregiver, you have a unique bond and insight into the needs of the creatures you care for. Your observations are valuable and can provide critical information for your practitioner.

5. Shut Down Peer Pressure: You may run into situations where you feel shamed by others for your decisions or your current knowledge base. This is not constructive or compassionate. If you experience this during any learning process, find new people to share your journey with. It is never ok for someone to treat you poorly, to shame you or belittle you while you are exploring something new, especially when it is being considered for you animal’s best interest. Find compassionate people to learn with – people who truly care about supporting you.

6. No One is To Blame: Be aware that when we are immersed in the phenomenon of illness,  emotions can run high. We can feel the need to blame ourselves or others for the situation. It does not serve anyone to play the blame game – especially the ill party. Stay objective.

   
   

Techniques to Maintain Presence and Reduce Stress

Maintaining your own well-being is crucial for effective caregiving. Here are some methods to help you stay grounded:

1. Meditation: Even brief sessions can induce relaxation. A study from Harvard Medical School has shown that meditation can lower heart rate and blood pressure, promoting a state of calm.

2. Journaling: Documenting your pet’s daily progress can help identify patterns and reduce the mental burden of recalling events. This practice provides a tangible record to share with your health professional. Additionally, journal for yourself if you need to let go of big feelings.

3. Physical Activity: Engaging in activities like a 20-minute walk can reduce stress hormones such as cortisol and adrenaline, helping to reset your emotional state. If you can bring your animal along, even better!

4. Seek Support: Sharing your experiences with a trusted friend or professional can alleviate feelings of isolation. Discussing your concerns can provide emotional relief and potentially offer new perspectives and support.

5. Self–Awareness: It’s important to recognize that your emotional state can significantly influence your pet’s well-being. Studies have demonstrated that dogs mirror the stress levels of their owners. For instance, research from Linköping University found that the stress levels in dogs closely align with those of their owners, suggesting that dogs mirror their owner’s stress rather than the other way around. Additionally, a study conducted by Queen’s University Belfast revealed that changes in an owner’s heart rate can predict similar changes in their dog’s heart rate, indicating that dogs can sense and reflect their owner’s stress levels. Managing your own stress and maintaining a calm demeanour is not only beneficial for you but also integral to helping your pet regulate their own stress and health.

6. Practicing Heart/Brain Coherence: Learn to synchronize your heart and your brain to create a calmer state for both you and your animal. Check out this short exercise with Gregg Braden to learn how.

   
   

Caring for a sick loved one, animal or human, is undeniably challenging, but you don’t have to face it alone. By acknowledging your emotions, seeking professional guidance or an understanding friend and practicing self-care, you can navigate this journey with greater ease and confidence. Finding a healthy support system is essential for the well-being of all involved.

Be kind to yourself and remember to breathe!